Saturday, April 26, 2008

Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008

“I thought you were EJ.” Oh, not even close. Yet why is John still hot after coming back from the gym, and why does he think this is an appropriate way to walk around in front of his guests? And for future reference, this is too much chest hair, Days. In addition, quit the mildly oblique John and EJ allusions unless you’re actually willing to give the subject matter the weight it deserves. There is simply no comparison between Stefano brainwashing an adult and abusing his own son for decades. Don’t diminish the cruelty EJ had to endure.

“Was EJ still at the gym when you left?” Aw, you miss him, don’t you, Sami?
“Is Samantha here?” “I don’t want her to know I’m home.” It’s a bad ABC sitcom! But I don’t blame EJ for not wanting to get berated again.

Ah, EJ looked so sad here trudging up the steps alone with his trusty newspaper by his side. I’m sorry; I wish you could slaughter John and Marlena too.

“Mom... you know what I'm talking about.” Because it’s not creepy at all to talk about lingerie with your mother.

“I do think you should be honest about your own feelings, though.” Marlena, as much as we would love to see Sami jump into EJ’s open arms next episode, that’s really not how this soap tries to tell stories. Sami will be “torn” for a while yet.
“I firmly believe that people can change, and I think he's trying. I mean, it's not 180 degrees, but he's coming along.” And let us be thankful it’s not 180 degrees! Evil EJ 2008! New and improved sizzling summer evil!
“EJ sacrificed his relationship with his father in order to help us. That's huge.” Thank you, show. And hey, Marlena, in order to balance out that part of you that will always hate EJ, why don’t you tell him about incapacitating his father so a part of him always hates you.

“I was not eavesdropping.” Although I’m pleased you totally denied it, yes, you were. It’s one of your favorite activities, Gray EJ, and you’re awesome at it.
“I was not standing there. I happened to be walking from point "a" to point "b." Maybe you'd like it if I wore a little bell around my neck so you can hear me coming.” Although I liked the hell hound crack better, someone is 2 for 2. Keep it up.
“Slugger here this morning decided to see if she could rearrange Nicole's face.” Also not bad. The correlation between evilness and wit could not be clearer, could it?

“Maybe you should listen to your mother, Samantha.”

I'm clawing at your skin
You gotta let me in

Yes, keep confronting her about her love for you, and she will eventually break.

Grade: A-. Blatant ecological corporate mandates behind us, we are back in business, and it’s good times here with the Marlena Ejami plug. Quite a difference from back in October when she said EJ had a black heart. Ah, direction changes. And what a pleasure to see you, Gray EJ. Please keep EJ on this darker personality path. Instead of slipping back to Summer EJ like you did at the health club, how about we have some fun in the sun and go forward to Evil EJ, eh? We could watch him relax on the beach…after he’s buried someone in the sand.

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